Written By Janet Schrick
Have you ever noticed the annoying bumps on the side of the highway while driving – the vibrating sound your car makes when you run over them? While they may annoying, these “rumble strips” are designed to wake you up and get you back on track, headed back in the right direction. In life, we also have rumble strips or warning signs – some we put in place ourselves (curfews, budgets, choosing the right friend groups), but some rumble strips occur in our lives because of poor choices we have made. When these type of rumble strips take place, it is how we react and move forward that determine our quality of life, our happiness, our success.
My sister was a D-1 college track athlete. In high school, she broke the Nebraska state discus record (which she still holds to this day) and earned a full ride scholarship to the University of Missouri. Based on her success in high school and in her first few years of college, a few coaches even thought that the Olympics were in her future. Her education was paid for, she was getting to do what she loved every single day. She was a beautiful girl, had a fun personality with tons of friends. On the outside, it looked like my sister had it all.
In November of my sister’s junior year in college, her life took a traumatic turn. While home for Thanksgiving, she got together with some friends and ended up at a party. After drinking an unknown amount of alcohol, the four of them got into a car and went for a joyride. They ended up crashing their vehicle into a tree at a “T” in the road; a country road made up of dirt and gravel where it is very difficult to control your vehicle when going at a high speed. All four kids were drunk. All four kids were college athletes. All four kids had career-ending injuries which caused them to lose their scholarships. My sister would never throw the discus again. She would never graduate college. Her hopes and dreams of becoming an Olympic athlete were shattered, all because of her choice to drink and get into a car with others who were drinking. Three out of the 4 kids were minors.
I have been sharing my sister’s story in middle schools, high schools, colleges, scout groups, corporate luncheons and parents groups since 2018. I will share it to anyone who will listen as I am intensely passionate about educating people, especially our youth, about the dangers of drugs and alcohol. You see, my sister died at the age of 26 from an accidental overdose of alcohol and opioids. She had a 2 week old baby daughter at the time of her death. How could this happen to such a talented young lady with such a promising future? My sister lived her life as if she was untouchable. Unfortunately, she never paid attention to her many rumble strips and ultimately, this caused her to lose her life at a very young age.
To keep this fairly brief, I’m going to outline my sister’s four main rumble strips that, if she had paid attention to these warning signs, she could have changed the trajectory of her life: 1) She started drinking at the very young age of 12. My parents did not have alcohol in the house when we were growing up. She and her friends snuck it into the house for her 12 year old birthday party sleepover. They ended up getting drunk at the young age of 12 and my parents had no idea. Lessons for parents – check on your kids. Know who they are hanging out with. And in case you weren’t aware, alcohol IS a drug. Parents who think it’s “not a big deal” and that “it’s better if they drink at my house because they are going to do it anyway” are saying it’s okay if their children and their children’s friends take drugs. There’s a reason the drinking age is 21 and not 12, or 16, or even 18. Alcohol greatly hinders brain development. Parents, we have to do better. 2) She got into a car accident (mentioned earlier) due to underage drinking, which then led to multiple surgeries due to injuries sustained in the accident. These surgeries led to opioid addiction. At the age of 20, my sister was addicted to both alcohol and opioids, was a former star athlete, kicked out of college, and living at home with my parents. 3) My sister was engaged to 4 men in 3 years. Her life was spiraling out of control. She struggled to keep a job. She was arrested for drunk driving. She spent 6 months in jail. Lost her license; was on house arrest. She ended up marrying a guy she knew for 6 weeks. He was a former marine who came home from Iraq with PTSD and a brain injury. He used alcohol to cope. This marriage lasted less than a year (not surprising). 4) Before separating from her husband, my sister got pregnant. During pregnancy, my sister drank, smoked and took pain pills. Not only was she putting herself in danger, but now she was putting the life of her unborn child in danger by the choices she was making.
When I give my presentations, I always ask the audience, “At what age did this start for my sister?” And, “Could she have gotten help?” She started using alcohol at the age of 12 and the answer is YES – she had multiple chances to get help, but she never once felt like paying attention to these warning signs and doing something about them that could have made her life better. And believe me, as a family, we tried.
The point I am desperately trying to make is that every single person on this earth will have rumble strips in their lives. As individuals, we have to decide what kind of life we are striving for. Rumble strips are in our lives for a reason – to keep us in check, to guide us back on track. If we can pay attention to these rumble strips, we could avoid possible heartache and even tragic situations like what happened to my baby sister. My final thoughts are that it is truly worth having this discussion with those that you love. Our time on this earth is limited. We owe it to ourselves and to our loved ones to live our best lives each and every day.
Thank you,
Janet
